Beef. It’s What’s For Dinner. Aaron Copland -“Hoedown”
political correctness
Butter Wouldn’t Melt In Her Mouth
“Honey. That old guy, John Heywood, was right. Do you know what I’m sayin’?”
Jabba the Trump and Princess Melania
Here’s a storyboard from the proposed 17th episode in the Star Wars saga – “Star Wars: Attack of the MAGA’s.”
Perfect Canadian Wife
Girls with axes are hot, eh?
Girls With Big ‘Effing Machine Guns
I love the smell of ‘gunpowder‘ perfume in the morning. It’s my Pumpkin Spice Latte.”
Maxine Waters Face-prints Sheets
The New York Times reports, “Maxine Waters’ Image Found On ‘Shroud’ at Motel 6.” Or maybe, not so much. It was actually sheets that the image was found on, and, upon further inspection, it appears that Ms. Waters’ excessive makeup simply ‘silk-screened’ itself onto the sheet after an overnight of face sleeping. Experts say that proper personal hygiene could help prevent such transfers in the future.
**FakeNewsAlert**
Bill Clinton On ‘Taking a Knee’
“It’s the patriotic thing to do Monica…”
Zuckerpocalypse – 2024
2020 or 2024, same difference. Will Big ZuckerBrother get to rule Oceania? Does it mean something that ZuckerBrother was born in 1984? He does have that “Big ZuckerBrother is Watching You” part down pat, for sure.
New NFL ‘Player Designed’ Helmet
In keeping with the spirit of “Letting the inmates run the asylum”, the leadership of the NFL has approved the new “player designed” headgear. Kumbaya, Bro….
A groundskeeper was heard saying about the new headgear, “Pussies to the left of me, pussies to the right. Pussies upstairs in the Broadcast booth, pussies in the Owner’s box and pussies in the Commissioners Office. There’s so many pussies in the NFL now that I’m catching a case of the cramps.”
Bamm Bamm – The Baby Bottle Robot
Bet you can’t guess why this little robot baby bottler is named ‘Bamm Bamm‘?
Kick ‘Spuds Mackenzie’ And His Buddies To The Curb
Are you fed up with Big Sports, Big TV, Big Endorsements, and Big Beer demanding your money, your time and your loyalty and then disrespecting you, your Values, your Flag, your Country, your Service Men and Women, and Your Law Enforcement Officers? Send them a message. Tell them they need you a whole lot more than you need them. Tell them that if they turn their back on our Flag that you’ll turn your back on them. You could start with that ugly dog, Spuds. You know. The one that hawks the Bud Light suds.
