WTF

Paris Zoo Unveils Bizarre, Brainless ‘Blob’ Capable of Learning

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—and Eating Oatmeal, says Smithsonian.

The Paris Zoological Park is home to some 180 species, many of which would be considered standard zoo fare: zebras, giraffes, penguins, toucans, turtles and the like. But this week, the Zoological Park will unveil a new exhibit featuring a bizarre creature that has surprised and puzzled scientists for decades. It’s formally known as Physarum polycephalum, but zoo staff have dubbed it the “blob.”

Sometimes these things just write themselves.

Miss Piggy Gets #Roasted

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When asked whether she preferred a ‘Dry Rub’ or something ‘Juicier’, Miss Piggy said, “Just suprise me.”

“Women are like bacon, they smell good, they probably taste good and they will kill you slowly.” Miss Piggy

AOC Becomes Chic-fil-A’s Newest Fan

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AOC’s Bizarre Town Hall Inadvertently Launches New Chic-fil-A Ad Spoof.

“But we’re not going to be here much long because of the climate crisis,” the woman blurted. “We got to start eating babies,” she abruptly declared, taking off her jacket to display a T-shirt that read: “Save the planet. Eat the children.”

…the lawmaker (AOC) said: “One of the things that’s very important to us is that we need to treat the climate crisis with the urgency that it does present. Luckily, we have more than a few months.”

A few more months? What? To test recipes?