Meanwhile in California

Newsom’s A Real Ball Buster

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“Hizzgovnah’s” ownliest own balls being the prime example

Internet goes nuts over Gavin Newsom’s odd ‘testicle-crushing’ sitting pose

New York Post–The internet had a ball Thursday mocking California Gov. Gavin Newsom’s weirdly tense “testicle-crushing” style of cross-legged sitting at a speaking engagement.

The 58-year-old pol was discussing National Guard policies at the New York Times Dealbook Summit when he struck a pose that made him the butt of a joke on social media.

“I have never seen a man crush his testicles harder than this dude,” @BoredElonMusk
tweeted, along with footage of the discussion Wednesday.

Some Other Festivals Of The Testicles

Gavin’s COVID Police

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Paddle boarder chased by boat, arrested in Malibu after flouting coronavirus closures

Los Angeles Times–A paddle boarder was arrested Thursday after ignoring lifeguards’ orders to get out of the ocean near the Malibu Pier despite beach closures amid the coronavirus pandemic, authorities said.

County lifeguards patrolling the shore by boat tried to get the man to come ashore. Despite repeated orders to exit the water, the man continued paddle boarding for at least 30 minutes. Lifeguards eventually flagged down Los Angeles County sheriff’s deputies who responded by boat to help, according to the Sheriff’s Department.

Video of the incident taken by bystanders along the shore and later posted to social media shows the man paddling toward the pier while being pursued by lifeguard and sheriff’s boats.