“That’s Gotta Hurt”
If You ‘Feel the Burn’ You May Want To…
America needs Bernie ‘The Burn’ Sanders’ Democratic Socialism just about as much as it needs a case of antibiotic resistant Gonorrhea. So go get checked out and for everyone’s sake, get the cure.
Daily Darwin – Skateur Flambé
Ah, yes. Darwin says. The old “Skaterboarder Flambé routine. Darwin’s suggests that to avoid such and occurrence, keeping one’s precious genomes warm is best accomplished by long johns and a woolly robe than by a ‘splash’ of gasoline and a spark.
Skateboard Flambé or, if you prefer, Skateur Flambé.
https://youtu.be/jblHbG17_nY
Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors
Resume Writing Advice For Laid Off Journalists
To improve your very slim chances of finding gainful employment, do not mention these personal or ‘professional’ accomplishments in your next resume or during any upcoming interviews.
MAGA Lion Attack Thwarted By Colorado Hiker
Just kidding. I was trying out the newest headline writing style practiced by the Mainstream Media, called “Smolletting”. Here’s the real story brought to you by the ‘real’ CNN.
From CNN, “Runner who suffocated mountain lion with his foot describes the attack.”
When Travis Kauffman went for a run near Fort Collins, Colorado, little did he know his workout would include suffocating a mountain lion.
“I feel like I should go buy a bunch of lottery tickets,” he said.
On Thursday, authorities identified Kauffman as the runner who won a fight-to-the-death struggle last week after the cat ambushed him along the trail.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez – “We Don’t Need Those Wackin’ Jobs”
From The Daily Caller, “OCASIO-CORTEZ RESPONDS TO BILLBOARD SHAMING HER FOR SLAMMING AMAZON — IT’S ‘WACK’
Amazon’s decision to ding a planned New York campus will cost the city thousands of jobs and billions of dollars in lost economic activity, the billboard claims.
Actually, what’s “wack” is that Ms. Ocasio-Cortez attacked the messenger, but somehow fail to address the facts presented by the billboard.
**25,000 Lost NYC Jobs
**4 Billion in Lost Wages
**12 Billion in Lost Economic Activity for New York
