/sarc ‘n /snark

Just A Fart In The Wind Or #PoopyPantsBiden

by

First that incident with the Poop… err, the Pope, that inspired the #PoopyPantsBiden meme, and now Camilla ‘can’t stop talking about’ hearing the President ‘break wind’ during a chat at Cop26 climate summit in Glasgow. Insiders say, that the Duchess has even been in contact with the rock group Kansas, in hopes they might update their signature tune…

DailyMail–He is supposed to be committed to reducing emissions – but when President Joe Biden produced a little natural gas of his own at the COP26 summit, it was audible enough to make the Duchess of Cornwall blush.

An informed source has told The Mail on Sunday that Camilla was taken aback to hear Biden break wind as they made polite small talk at the global climate change gathering in Glasgow last week.

‘It was long and loud and impossible to ignore,’ the source said. ‘Camilla hasn’t stopped talking about it.’

Kansas – Dust in the Wind (Official Video)

**/sarc ‘n /snark

News Ripped From The Headlines Of “News Yet to Come”

by

Female Weightlifter Suffers Tragic Testicle Injury Just Weeks Before Tokyo Olympics

The Babylon Bee–100% totally female weightlifter Laurel Hubbard was forced to bid farewell to her Olympic dreams yesterday after a tragic accident left her with a severely lacerated testicle. Hubbard would have been the first transgender woman to compete in the Olympics.

The injury is not life-threatening, but doctors have advised Hubbard that she needs to refrain from heavy lifting for at least six to eight weeks as her injury heals. Obviously, that means Olympic weightlifting is off the table.

**The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come (“News Yet to Come”) appropriately appropriated from Charles Dickens
**/sarc ‘n /snark

CNN Breaking News! Flat Earther Surfing Disaster

by

FakeNews CNN’s Brian ‘Tater’ Stelter reports “Surfers on edge after 40 go missing…”

‘Tater’ is sure to “Get Peeled” for trying to resurrect his failing show with this cheesy (and we’re pretty sure it’s a FakeNews)story. Since Former President Donald Trump left the White House, CNN has lost almost 70% of its viewers.


**/sarc ‘n /snark

Meanwhile In Canada (by way of Cornwall) – “Mon Dieu! Benoit? Summon the Mounties.”

by

Masculine Pronouns??  Justin says “Nyet! Vladie. There ain’t no stinking masculinity here…”

The Babylon Bee–World War 3 was nearly started after G7 attendees referred to Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau using masculine pronouns, misgendering the progressive, inclusive, genderless leader.

“Excuse me — him?” an indignant Trudeau said after he overheard Putin referring to him using male pronouns. “How dare you! Did you just assume my gender? Wow. I mean, I thought this was the current year!”

Flintstones Vitamins With ‘Advanced’ Puberty Blockers

by

Babylon Bee–Bayer AG, the multinational pharmaceutical corporation, has announced a brand new line of trans-friendly Flintstones vitamins laced with puberty-blocking hormones. To help normalize early childhood transition, the vitamins will be on sale over the counter without restriction.

Flintstones vitamins’ new girl-to-boy chewables will be made of anabolic steroids with vitamins and delicious fruit flavors added in. The vitamins will be completely organic and hormone-free– except, of course, for the synthetic hormones which are the active ingredient.

Other Puberty Blocking ‘Strateries’

**/sarc ‘n /snark
**Found here.