“We’re All Gonna Die”

Bernie’s ‘Cardiac Event’ Opens Door For Hillary

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Hillary Clinton denies rumors that the “Triple C” Campaign Catering Company (a Chelsea Clinton Company, and subsidiary of Clinton, Inc.) has been catering Bernie Sanders’ meals since January 2017.  She further states that there is no truth to the rumor that the “Triple C” only uses lard and beef tallow to prepare it’s recipes.  “It’s just another vast Right Wing conspiracy,” she says.

Darwin On The Evolution Of The New Democratic Gene Pool

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Darwin finds himself literally rolling on the floor laughing his ass off at his discovery of the, shall we politely say, “closed” nature of the New Democrats gene pool.  He finds this particularly ironic due to their fixation on making references to ‘cousins’ and ‘Arkansas’ and ‘Trump voters’.  But, of course, he notes sagely, anyone that believes “Socialism” works is a few genomes short of 23andMe.

Natural selection deems that some individuals serve as a warning to others. Who are we to disagree? The next generation, ever and anon, is descended from the survivors

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