Lego’s New Slogan – “Never Let A Crisis Go To Waste When You Can Make It A Marketing Opportunity”

FBI seized ‘fully constructed’ US Capitol Lego set from home of alleged rioter

The Hill–The FBI seized a “fully constructed” Lego set of the U.S. Capitol from the home of an alleged insurrectionist. Prosecutors detailed the finding in a court document for Robert Morss, who was arrested on June 11 at his home in Glenshaw, Pa. The government argued that Morss should be detained from court pending trial.

**Lego ‘Capitol Invasion’ set includes the QAnon Shaman – Woo-Hoo!!

Beer, Babes, And Baseball – The Fabric Of Legends

Oopsie! Meant Babies. With only his left hand, the dude dropped the kid, reached out and made the catch and then re-caught the kid mid-fall. His right hand? Well, that was for the beer. Not a drop was spilled.

Now when Dad gets home, Mom might have a discussion on parental priorities waiting for him. And, perhaps, a spot waiting for him in the dog house.

William Shatner Launches Major Jeff Where No Mogul Has Gone Before

Petitions to Keep Jeff Bezos in Space After Blue Origins Launch Exceed 100,000 Signatures

Jeff Bezos in Star Trek Beyond

Newsweek–Petitions calling on Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos to stay in space once he gets there have been signed more than 100,000 times since they were launched two weeks ago.

Bezos is a multi-billionaire and world’s richest person with a net worth of around $200bn, according to Forbes. He is due to travel to space on July 20 with Blue Origin, the private rocket company he founded.

Next month’s launch is purely for pleasure, marking the growth of the nascent space tourism industry.

William Shatner Launches Major Jeff Where No Mogul Has Gone Before

News Ripped From The Headlines Of “News Yet to Come”

Female Weightlifter Suffers Tragic Testicle Injury Just Weeks Before Tokyo Olympics

The Babylon Bee–100% totally female weightlifter Laurel Hubbard was forced to bid farewell to her Olympic dreams yesterday after a tragic accident left her with a severely lacerated testicle. Hubbard would have been the first transgender woman to compete in the Olympics.

The injury is not life-threatening, but doctors have advised Hubbard that she needs to refrain from heavy lifting for at least six to eight weeks as her injury heals. Obviously, that means Olympic weightlifting is off the table.

**The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come (“News Yet to Come”) appropriately appropriated from Charles Dickens
**/sarc ‘n /snark

Ground Control To Major Jeff

66,000+ People Sign Petition to Stop Jeff Bezos from Returning to Earth After Spaceflight

Breitbart–More than 66,000 people have signed two petitions calling to Amazon founder Jeff Bezos to not return to earth after he leaves the planet on a Blue Origin rocket next month.

The petition description states: “Billionaires should not exist…on earth, or in space, but should they decide the latter they should stay there.” Many signatories provided reasoning for their signing, such as “being let back into Earth is a privilege — not a right,” and “Earth don’t want people like Jeff, Bill, Elon and other such billionaires” referring to Bill Gates and Elon Musk.

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